Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Thought my best days had left me behind

I think I just hit a realization.
I am searching for something that you can usually only obtain in your childhood.
I think there are certain types of friendships that can only develop into the closeness that they have become because of your young years together.
I have a dull pain in my head.  It could be because a number of things...
The fact that the dentist put too much filling in my tooth and so I strain every time i close my jaw
or that my loneliness is getting to me and my restlessness is finally at its peak
or that I have a brain tumor...

I guess its just really dry out.
That must be a metaphor

Maybe the flow in my home isn't correct?!

I miss my friend.  I wish she was here.  I am selfish enough to wish she was here, and I not there.
I actually miss the days I thought I was so bored sitting on the couch with her for hours on the computer...
She inspired me to do art..I really haven't worked on anything since she's gone.

Its one of those friendship where you just feel so comfortable with them, and you know they get you, and are quite like you, but different.

Someone that you really do feel is part of your family.

I think aside from really loving the music, I have been purchasing certain records to feel like I am sharing something with her.

She's my bff for life.  It scares me to think that we will always be far from one another.
But I am thankful for her. 

Why does it have to be so hard as an adult to find that?
I wish it was the summer, 1993, in Michigan.